Friday, June 9, 2017



My Troubled Friend Jasmine!
Hi! I’m Jyothi, a student of a professional college. Jasmine is my church mate and a close friend. She works for a private company after her professional education. Jasmine called me the other day and asked for counsel about some important concerns in her life. As we talked, the story of her life was unfolded. She has recently developed some special feelings about Rohan, a young man at her workplace. For some time Jasmine couldn’t understand her feelings towards him and so she tried to brush it aside. But the feelings grew stronger slowly as they were part of the same workgroup and spent a lot of time together daily. Unknowingly she was falling into a relationship with him that has become stronger day by day. Now they both feel that they are made for each other. But lately, Jasmine is much alarmed because Rohan is from another religion and had no particular affinity for fundamental Christianity.  Other than that, Rohan seems to be a very nice person in Jasmine’s opinion, with good family background and moral values. He is highly qualified and well respected in the office and also very good looking. At his request, Jasmine visited his home a few times and got herself acquainted with his dignified parents and only sister.

As days went by, Rohan started discussing with Jasmine about their future. Though Jasmine desperately wanted to marry Rohan, she seemed to be quite unsure about how to handle it because she is a born again and baptized believer in our church. Her father is an Elder, and mother, a leader of the Sister’s Fellowship. Her elder brother Sabu is also a committed Christian and is married to a committed Christian from an assembly. Jasmine felt that if she speaks to her parents and brother about her interest in Rohan, there will be turmoil at home. In the meanwhile, her relationship with Rohan grew stronger and they both felt that they were inseparable.

After much struggle for about 6 months, Jasmine finally decided to share her concerns about her faith with Rohan. But he took her concern very lightly because he didn’t understand her kind of Christianity well. Rohan told Jasmine that he would not have any problem accepting her as his life partner in spite of their differences in faith. He told her that he will have no difficulty to go to her church and that he would even accompany her for some service in the church if she so desired. He promised to remove his colorful wristband while going to her church to avoid embarrassment for her and her family although he loved to wear these in public. He also invited her to go with him to his temple sometime. Jasmine tried to explain the difficulties she and her family would have in conducting their marriage.  Then Roshan suggested that the marriage may be conducted by his family according to their faith or they could even have a registered marriage. Jasmine had no answers to such suggestions. She has been struggling with this matter and found it difficult to pray or read her Bible. She often went for meetings in the assembly just to impress upon the people that everything is OK with her Christian life. She was careful that no one at home or in the church found out anything about her relationship with Rohan. After all, it was not difficult for her and Rohan to get lost in the crowd of the big city where they dwelt and not noticed by anyone!

Jasmine finally shared with her brother Sabu in a soft manner about her relationship with Rohan, with the plea not to reveal it to their parents. She thought her brother would somehow help her in this matter. Sabu was upset and shocked about the relationship his sister Jasmine has with an unbeliever and he was much worried. And he lost no time in lovingly reminding her of her faith and the commandment of the Bible about (1) having such relationships with an unbeliever (2) her disguised life to impress upon people about her faith and (3) the audacity about thinking to marry an unbeliever. He warned her about the consequences of such a relationship and a possible marriage. He also told her that it would be impossible for him to support her in her relationship and shared his biblical convictions against such a relationship. Anyway, he gave her a few days to think it over and promised to pray for her. Jasmine was at once in a great fix because she was not getting any support from her brother. She is lost as to what to tell her brother on the one hand and Rohan on the other. She was bewildered just imagining about the possible reactions of her parents if and when they found out about it. It was at that time that she decided to share her story with me, hoping to get some support and a workable solution.

I was greatly shocked and emotionally crushed as I listened to the story Jasmine told me. I didn’t have the slightest hint about the emotional entanglement she had with a young man, that too from another faith! I tried to persuade her to give up her relationship with a man from another faith which is against the Word of God which will have serious consequences. I also felt sad thinking about her parents who are devout Christians having a rich ministry in the spiritual circles. I knew very well that news about Jasmine’s affair with an unbeliever would break their hearts. But Jasmine told me with tears in her eyes that she is unable to separate from Rohan. I tried to pray with her, but Jasmine was not much keen. I once again told her that her relationship would break her family and create havoc in her assembly. But she had no answers to such concerns. It seems that it is not easy to coerce Jasmine to renounce Rohan on the one hand and her family and church on the other. What can I do, I wonder!!


Questions for discussion

1.       Is Jasmine biblically right in her relationship with an unbeliever? How could she have avoided it at the beginning?
2.       Has Jasmine been true to her calling as a Christian believer? Do you think she has any spiritual problems?
3.       What kinds of temptations and challenges lay waiting for Christian Youth like Jasmine in the secular world?
4.       What do you think about Jasmine’s brother’s role in this scenario?

5.       Is it right for Jasmine to marry Rohan at this time?
6.       If Jasmine is your friend, how will you handle this situation?
7.       Is Jyothi justified in her concerns about Jasmine?
8.       Should we have such concerns about other believers who have spiritual problems? How can we discharge these concerns?
9.       What lessons, if any, are you able to learn from the present events in the life of Jasmine?

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